Forever Disqualified

Blake and I love the show Chopped on Food Network. When Lottie was in the “she-is-cute-to-look-at-but-does-absolutely-nothing” stage, we always looked forward to cooking dinner. We had tapped out our baby staring-o-mometers and we needed something else to entertain us. We cooked every night. Soon, we became bored with that  as well. One night when we were engaged in the highlight of our week, the new episode of Chopped, it hit me! We can play our own version of the show.

For those of you who are not familiar with the show. Four chefs from around the country compete in a culinary challenge. Each of them are given a “mystery basket” filled with four ingredients. They are given a short limit of time to create a restaurant-worthy dish to present to judges. The worst dish gets “Chopped”, and the remaining chefs move to the next round until there is one winner.

“Foster Chopped” is a little different. At first, Blake and I competed. He gave me a basket, and I gave him one. We made one small plate each, and made honest judgement and against one another. This form of “Foster Chopped” was ended abruptly when I almost put my precious “cute-to-look-at-but-does-absolutely-nothing” infant in the ER.

Blake opened his basket, and I treated him with flank steak, black beans, gnocchi and grapes. He hit me with Kielbasa sausage, pineapple, peanut butter and habenero peppers. At the time, Blake and I were living in a condo on the lake. Outdoor grills were not allowed so we had an indoor grill pan. Definitely more dangerous. I envisioned myself creating an Asian grilled meal with Thai peanut sauce. I just knew I was going to win.

My plan was simple: heat up the grill pan and start grilling. I always saw the likes of Emeril and Bobby Flay grilling up pretty much anything. They always found a way to get that delightful char on the outside of their peppers. I was going for this. The sausage, coated in its Asian style marinade, went on without a hitch. I cut the pineapple into unique shapes just to show off. “Boom” they hit the grill. On to the peppers…

I decided to skewer a few of them. I knew that Habeneros were hot peppers, but I didn’t know how hot. After skewering them up, I tossed them on the hot grill pan inside our less than adeqautely ventilated condo. I immediately turned to finish my peanut sauce ensuring I make every item in the mystery box a stand out. Within 30 seconds, Blake and I were tearing up and coughing, and Lottie went from a peaceful siesta to a screaming rage. I thought for sure we had been gassed. It was the end of the world. This wasn’t just happening to me, but to everyone in the world. “What do we do? Where do we go? Hold your loved ones tightly people.”

“Meredith, are you serious?” I heard my passive and overly kind husband say to me with an unheard of brusque tone. At the time, I am still running through my memory book, and I am cupping my palms over my sweet girls air passage ways to protect her from the deadly fumes. Blake raced over to the grill pan, turns it off, takes my skewer of peppers to the deck and promptly tosses them into the receeding water levels known as Lake Lanier. He walked back in coughing and grabbed Lottie from my arms. He grabbed my hand, nearly ripped my cooking shoulder square out of the socket and guided our little family upstairs and out the front door.

In my still oblivious mind, I am picturing my neighbors racing out their doors in a panic from the world-wide gassing. I was shocked to see it was just Blake, Lottie and me. I peek over at Blake who is looking into our helpless infant’s eyes to make sure she is ok. She is calm at this point. He looks up at me. His look is abnormally unplesant. “Are you serious about grilling whole Habeneros with the seeds?” he asked me in a belittling tone. I peek behind him, then behind me hoping to see others evaucating. Still just us. “Bobby Flay grills peppers all the time,” I say as I run through my Boy Meets Grill Episode schema hoping to picture him grilling a hot pepper. All I see in my mind of memories is green pepper, red pepper and poblano….nothing hot. “Whoops” I say to my disappointed husband and zoned out infant. I knew I had really messed up. The house was a danger zone. Blake went in to turn on the fans and open the windows. I followed him in thinking for sure things would be fine by now. SIX HOURS later, we were able to return to living within the walls of the condo.

From this point on, I have stayed out of the kitchen. I opt for shopping, finding deals and creating challenging mystery baskets for Blake to prepare. I am forever disqualified from “Foster Chopped”. Blake on the other hand has made some amazing dishes. Here are the recipes from the highlights of each basket.

Last week he was given:

Trout
Brazil Nuts
Brussel Sprouts
Apple Sauce

Boom!!! He busted out Bacon Wrapped trout on jalapeno-apple grits and sauteed brussel sprouts. It was amazing!

Chopped Round 1

Bacon Fried Skin-On Trout

Ingredients:

  • 2 skin-on trout filets
  • 4 slices bacon
  • Pinch of salt, pepper, garlic powder/salt

Directions:

  1. Pat the trout dry with paper towels.
  2. Season the trout on both sides with a little salt, pepper, and garlic.
  3. Place 2 slices of bacon on each trout filet on the side without skin, covering the filet.  Bacon should be trimmed to evenly cover the trout in a single layer, let rest for 5-10 minutes.
  4. Heat a saute pan on the stove over medium-high heat.
  5. Place the trout bacon side down in the oil, it should sizzle.
  6. Cook until the bacon is cooked through and a crispy golden brown, about 4-5 minutes.
  7. Flip the trout and cook skin side down in the bacon grease until crispy and golden brown, about 2-3 minutes.

The next night he was given:

Pork Chops
Potatoes
Apricots
Pimento-Jalapeno Cheese

He created Pimento Cheese scalloped potatoes with a saffron, yes real saffron, cream sauce, fried pickles and okra and grilled pork chops with apricot compote. Really dude? How awesome are you?

Foster Chopped Round 2

Fried Okra and Pickles:

Ingredients:

  • 2 eggs
  • 1/2 cup milk
  • 1 cup flour
  • 1/4 cup panko bread crumbs
  • 1 tsp salt
  • Pinch of pepper, garlic powder/salt, cayenne, and paprika
  • 12-16 okra halves
  • 4 pickle spears
  • Oil for frying

Directions:

  1. Mix eggs and milk with a pinch of salt, garlic, cayenne, and paprika.
  2. Place okra and pickles into the egg and milk mixture and toss.
  3. Mix flour, panko, 1 tsp salt, pinch of pepper, garlic, cayenne, and paprika.
  4. Place the soaked okra and pickles into the flour mixture(let excess liquid drain), and toss.  Let sit and set up for 5-10 minutes.
  5. Heat oil to around 375 degrees, until a okra piece really bubbles and sizzles when it is dropped.
  6. Drop the okra and pickles and let fry until they are floating and are a deep golden brown.
  7. Remove the okra and pickles onto a plate or in a bowl lined with paper towels and let sit for 2-3 minutes before eating.

Apricot Balsamic Sauce:

Ingredients:

  • 3 Diced Apricots
  • 1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
  • 1 1/2 tbsp brown sugar
  • 1 tbsp butter

Directions:

  1. Heat butter over medium-high heat in a saute pan.
  2. Add in diced apricots and brown sugar, stir.
  3. Cook mixture until it is nicely browned and set, about 3-5 minutes.
  4. When the mixture is cooked and the pan is nice and hot add in the balsamic vinegar, it should sizzle and simmer rapidly.
  5. Let the sauce cook together and reduce by about 1/3rd.  Add more balsamic if it gets too reduced or thick. 
  6. Serve over meat of choice.

For the final night I thought Blake deserves a really tough basket. I gave him:

Filet Mignon
Mushrooms
Anchovies
Nacho Cheese Doritos

He created Grilled Filets with Caesar Broccoli and zuchini stuffed mushrooms topped with crushed Doritos.

 Dorrito Stuffed Mushrooms

Ingredients:

  • 8 mushrooms caps
  • 1 slice bacon diced
  • 1/2 zucchini and/or squash julienned (cut into thing strings like pasta)
  • 2 tbsp crushed Nacho Cheese Doritos

Directions:

  1. Hollow out mushroom caps, drizzle lightly with olive oil and a pinch of salt and pepper, set aside in a pan lined with olive oil.
  2. Heat diced bacon over medium-high heat until lightly browned, about 3 minutes.
  3. Add julienned zucchini and cook with bacon until entire mixture is browned, about 4 minutes.
  4. Spoon zucchini and bacon mixture into mushrooms.
  5. Preheat oven to 375.
  6. Place mushrooms into the oven and cook until they darken and moisten, about 6 minutes.
  7. Sprinkle crushed dorritos over the mushrooms and cook another 3-4 minutes.
  8. Serve hot.

Live Wellington

We are rednecks; not “T-top rednecks” or the rednecks that use the Confederate Flag in the back of a pick-up truck to make a statement, but just country-classy rednecks. You know the boiled peanut, front porch swing, sweet tea, meat and three type redneck? Well, tonight, we shoved the redneck in us to the side and decided to go upscale.

We love to find coupons and save money on cooking great meals, but that doesn’t always mean we eat cheap food.  This recipe uses a great cut of Filet Mignon, which is costly, but can be found on sale often and is worth every penny.  This is a take on the classic Beef Wellington dropping the liver pate, and replacing it with thinly sliced ham or prosciutto.  It is one of Blake’s favorite and only alterations of tenderloin.  Blake prefers this with no sides so it sits beautifully on a plate or wide bowl all alone, and it gives him an excuse to pig out on appetizers and dessert!

Eating this dish makes you feel like royalty or dining at a 5-star restaurant, and it does take a decent amount of preparation, but it sounds and reads much harder than it is.  It is actually a good deal of fun and a great time in the kitchen.  It is not that hard at all, and once you do it one time you will see how easy it is to cook it for 2 or 8 people with almost no added effort increasing the size and it can be a real crowd pleaser.  Enjoy!!

BEEF WELLINGTON

Serves 4

Total Price- $21.96

Total Price per Person- $5.49

Average Retail Price- $51.60

Total Savings- $29.64

Precut Beef Wellington

1 puff pastry (Phyllo Dough)

4-6” section of tenderloin

7 thin slices of ham or prosciutto

1 ½ cups mushrooms

½ vidalia onion

pinch of salt, pepper

1 tsp coarse salt

4 tbsp butter

1 tsp oil

2 beat eggs

1 can beef stock

3 tbsp red wine

The picture doesn't do it justice

1)      Take out one puff pastry and let it begin thawing, and preheat oven to 400 degrees.

2)      Mince up the mushrooms and Vidalia onion as fine as possible.  A food processor works perfectly.  This will be the consistency of paste so if you lack a food processor feel free to smash it, bash it, and do whatever you can to get it to a paste.  Cooking it and then crushing it up with a blunt object will work fine.

3)      Heat 1 ½ tbsp butter in a medium sauté pan, and add the mushroom and onion mixture with a pinch of salt and pepper.  Saute for 10-12 minutes until a fine paste forms and set aside.

4)      Heat a sauté pan up on high heat with a very thin layer of oil or butter spray.  Add ½ tbsp of butter when the pan is hot and place the tenderloin section into the pan.  Brown on all sides, roughly 1 minute per side.  Add ½ tbsp butter each time you turn it.  Set aside the tenderloin, and set aside the pan off of the heat, but keep the pan drippings in the pan.  DO NOT wash the pan.

5)      Let the beef and mushroom mixture cool to room temperature.

6)      Lay out a portion of plastic wrap on the counter.  Layer it with the thinly sliced ham starting at the left side.  It needs to be a big enough layer to complete surround the meat.

7)      Spread the mushroom and onion mixture thinly on the ham.  It should be roughly 1 cm thick and just a nice spread.  Imagine spreading jelly on a piece of toast.

8)      Place the tenderloin in the center of the ham, and fold the ham all around the filet.  Wrap it in the plastic wrap so that it is nice and tight and place into the refrigerator for 20-25 minutes.

9)      While it is cooling take the sauté pan from earlier and place over high heat.  Add the can of beef broth, and the red wine.  If there was any meat trimmings or some spare onions laying around throw them in there as well.  Thyme sprigs also go well in this.

10)  Bring to a boil and keep at a high simmer until it reduces down about 80% to a nice syrup texture.  If it gets too evaporated and stuff is sticking to the pan add another splash of wine or water and scrape up all the goodies from the bottom of the pan.  Set the sauce aside.

11)  On a floured surface place the puff pastry and roll it out until it is enough to wrap around the tenderloin and about half as thick as it is out of the box.

12)  Take the wrapped tenderloin out of the fridge and remove the plastic wrap.  Place it onto the rolled out pastry in the center.

13)  Brush the pastry all over with the beaten egg yolks, and then wrap it around the tenderloin.

14)  Trim pastry so that there is as little overlap as possible.

15)  Place the pastry wrapped tenderloin seam side down in a pan and brush thoroughly with the beaten eggs.

16)  Sprinkle the coarse salt over the top if you have it.

17)  Score the top of the pastry with a sharp nice, but do not cut all the way through to the meat.

18)  Place in the oven and cook for 25-27 minutes for rare-medium rare, 27-30 minutes for medium rare, etc.  This is based on a 4” portion.  If you have a meat thermometer 125-130 degrees is a good medium rare.

19)  Remove from the oven and let set for 5-10 minutes.

20)  Slice as you would slice the tenderloin, into 1-2” portions depending on size you want.

21)  Drizzle with the beef and red wine sauce and serve immediately.

SALES used in this recipe

Prime Beef Tenderloin- Patton’s Meat Market $8.99/lb for whole loin

Average Retail- $19.99/lb when purchase pound per pound

Pillsbury Puff Pastry- Publix 3/$5.00 plus Manufacturers Coupon for $0.40 doubles

Average Retail- $2.49 each

Mushrooms- Super H Mart $0.38/ container

Average Retail- $2.49/conatiner

Onions- Super H 3lb bag for $0.98

Average Retail- $3.99/3 lb bag

Boar’s Head prosciutto- Publix $11.29/lb

Average Retail- $24.99/lb